I think sometimes we shrug our hearts as much as our shoulders.
We shrug off our hurts and the aches and escape the concerned glances of others.
We step back from our friends, because the friendships out of college, just don’t meet our expectations.
We know the needs,
but we ignore them.
We settle into routines with swollen eyes, from lack of sleep, and patched hearts from constant rejection.
We lose hope and we embrace the loss.
Rather than prepping our souls for battle, we consider it already a lost cause.
Rather that reaching out to those reaching out to us, we sink slowly into hiding.
We deny ourselves the greatest gift of being known.
We consider the friendships don’t suffice anymore. That it’s just not enough.
It’s a maddening transition going from the days of ease, running down the hallway or across the quad, to seek solace in another- to days when your heart’s running on empty and the closest friend you have is hundreds of miles away.
And well, we can either welcome this transition, choosing to overcome it or it will gladly overcome us.
Dynamics of friendships will change and they will keep changing.
You will change and you will keep changing.
Your sisterhood from college dorms has parted- some are mothers, teachers, counselors, learners, foreigners. And while you may feel that you are right back where you started, that isn’t the case.
Plant your feet firmly on holy ground and let your eyes look around.
You’ve changed, precious heart. He is changing you and He is moving in that heart of yours.
You may feel like you are at a standstill and everyone else, those sisters and brothers, have moved on, but that is so far from the truth.
You’re moving, and you’re shaking this world of yours, whether or not you see it.
But even on your best days, you can’t live alone.
You were made to live in the shelter of others.
So maybe your friendships from days past have changed, the closeness has been gathering dust, but just as His mercies are new every morning- there are new friendships to be found.
There are moments yet to be had, but you can lose them if your heart shrugs away the loneliness and you blatantly ignore your needs.
So call up that friend of yours from years ago, allow yourselves to reminisce for a moment, and then let the present usher in its beautiful reality, telling the ‘tales of now,’ that you’ve been bottling up and keeping to yourself.
Or if seasons have changed and you seem stranded on a gravel road, look about you. I’m pretty sure He will surprise you with bonds that come out of nowhere and friendships that begin with limited characters.
Because darling, the truth is you were made to be known, no matter how hard you try to immerse yourself in denial and shrug off the truth; you’ll always find that gaping hole that only your people can fill.
So choose to be hopeful today. Let go of the tempting shyness and stumble onward into the light and you will find others to join you along the road.
I know you will.
Sure it won’t be as easy as those years when hallways joined you, knitted your friendship family together, but that doesn’t mean the results will be any less beautiful.