This. Is. Not. The. End.

You know those questions that cause a domino effect in your soul when they are asked; I was asked one of those the other day. 

This simple question caused my breath to catch in my throat and my heart to flutter with its fireflies a bit faster. 

What has Overcome the Lie meant to me?

You see, loves, I have been lost in transition and translation, lately. 

The world I know isn't the one I have been living in. 

My familiar is waking to the city of a million, fresh orange juice being squeezed just down the street on my walk to work, it's the combis running to and fro throughout my city, it's the realization that my heart is where it was always supposed to be- in Mexico. 

But since July, I have been settling back into Indiana, trying to make it home again. I've been pouring my 25 years into two jobs, seven days a week. I've been in constant motion every single day. 

To the point, of just wanting some extra sleep to hold me over, of relishing the twenty + hour weekends, because at least I'm only present at one job, instead of many. 

I've been lost in transition, because friends that convinced me our friendship was forever have become mothers and wives, or just have moved along with someone holding their once empty hands. 

And I'm here. 

Broken promises. 

Lost friendships. 

But even if they were here and very much present, would my heart have the time to be filled by them?

That's a question I have to ask myself, 

but this beautiful campaign has awakened my soul to friendships, built to thrive on distance. 

It's given me hope. 

I've been able to wake up and get through my days, because of the promised sisterhood I have received through limited characters. 

I've been able to pour myself into hearts and be poured into, in return. 

Because if you think about it: you spend this life emptying yourself, yes, 

but at some point you need truth to fill you up. 

You empty yourself to be filled again. 

Your spirit needs people. 

It needs to be filled. 

And no book, movie, music will ever fill up the space God reserved for community when he made you.  That's just impossible. 

You can try to fill yourself with things, but those things rust, they mold, they die. 

But you, darling girl, your people live on...

and in the shelter of them, you live. 

That's what this has meant to me. 

I have spent most of these months in reverse culture shock, hiding away from settling in or pursuing all of this with new eyes, because I've been afraid. 

I held onto the lie that this is all there is for me. 

But I am meant to be where I am, for such a time as this. 

And that doesn't mean that my soul is singing my Indiana home. 

However, it does mean that my heart is resting on the reason, that I'm needed here. 

All the while, rejoicing because this is not the end. 

No. This. Is. Not. The. End. 

My God isn't finished with me. 

I have sisters all over the country, speaking life into my soul. 

And these things are what are keeping me moving. 

So if you are also lost in transition and translation, or are clinging to the lies...

just know, 

that. you. are. not. alone. 

this. is. not. the. end.

If you need truth or somebody, I'm here. 

We can walk together, love. 

We can overcome the lies together. 

This is not the end

This is not the end of this

We will open our eyes wide, wider

This is not our last

This is not our last breath

We will open our mouths wide, wider

And you know you'll be alright

Oh and you know you'll be alright

This is not the end

This is not the end of us

We will shine like stars bright, brighter

-Gungor, "This Is Not The End"